TYPICAL 5 YEAR OLD BEHAVIOR

Today i will be discussing your five-year-old by Luis bates-ames this book is one of the whole books series as part of a large study conducted by the Giselle institute of human development where they studied thousands of children between birth to 16 years old Over 100 years their observations led them to understand that child behavior does develop in a highly patterned way just like babies have what we call regressions young children also continue to have clear and predictable stages of equilibrium and disequilibrium which basically means periods of regulation and periods of dysregulation which explains why parenting can be felt like such a roller coaster sometimes they still acknowledge that each child is unique this is simply a representation of the average child of this age a huge generalization so you need to take the information that i will be presenting to you today with a grain of salt.

These ages are also only provided as a guide a child could be as much as a year

ahead or behind any supposed average and still be quite within normal limits

their goal when writing these books was simply to help normalize periods of dysregulation in childhood

and reassure parents that it is all normal and just a phase that won't last forever so next time you catch yourself thinking we were doing so well now she fights me on everything that happened try to remember that what happened is simply development first, we'll discuss characteristics of the five-year-old then we will discuss more specifics like social development motor development and language development and then we will discuss specific parenting advice for this age let's start with the characteristics of the five-year-old and here is the good news with most five-year-old’s some really good times are ahead of five really wants to be good means to be good and more often than not succeeds in being good he enjoys love so much and looks so consistently on its sunny side he wants to be good and do everything right even his language is on the positive side sure fine wonderful are among his favorite words.

He lives in the here and now and he cares very much about his own room his own home his street neighborhood and kindergarten room whilst at four he was wild and adventurous at five is actually the complete opposite he is by nature quieter more pulled in closer to the home he not only prefers to stay within prescribed boundaries but he feels most comfortable with the tried and true he is less resistant not working on proving that he's his own boss unlike other ages, five often shows a remarkable ability to protect himself from overstimulation he actually knows his limits quite well five is usually not a warrior he seems to take for granted that he and his parents are eternal he does not delve too far into the past and gives relatively little thought to the future.

Let's move on to social development and interest

there is now a strong feeling for the family including pets the five-year-old adores his parents he sees them as the ultimate authorities and they are especially close to their mom, they see her as the center of their world and they want to please her and be near her in fact, they feel so close to their mom that they sometimes overestimate her ability to read their mind and then they can get quite angry if she doesn't understand what they're talking about what he loves most of all to do is play and he loves to play with others although he tends to play better with two friends than with three and he loves to play house imaginative play is still very strong at this age five is a factual age and most five-year-old love to work with materials to actually make things which is why they tend to love kindergarten so much where they do things like cutting pasting tracing drawing all activities that give him the chance to practice his increasing constructive and creative abilities and they also love making big construction with blocks unlike his expensive 4-year-old self the 5-year-old is now poised and controlled physically and he appears more is trained and lessactive because he can actually stay in the same position for long periods and he loves to help around the house so this is a great age to start getting them involved in doing chores whilst he's less active one thing that he loves to do is to climb trees and at five usually, the dominant hand is well established in terms of dressing himself mothers of five-year-old tend to report that he can but it just doesn't and eating tends to take a long time because he loves to talk a lot and he tends to wriggle in his chair and he may ask towards the ends to be helped to finish his plate

Now let's move on to language thought a

typical five-year-old is not particularly physically expensive in most ways he's expensive intellectually he likes to be read to likes to be talked to and he loves to learn new facts he likes to practice his own intellectual abilities the typical five-year-old loves to talk so much that some parents complain that their child talks constantly most love to be read too and they really like the idea that soon themselves will be able to read and he asks a lot of questions he really wants to know the Fabio still has difficulty distinguishing between fantasy and reality so, it happened by magic is still an acceptable answer to a five-year-old question he learns that action have both causes and effects but he may still explain outside events in terms of his own wishes and needs saying things like it rained because I wanted it to he may even believe that objects and natural events have human thoughts and feelings saying things like it rained because the club was angry the five-year-old is beginning to try to figure things out for himself he makes his own generalization often based on inadequate evidence I remember at five my eldest realizing that because her dad was one year older than me making this statement on his birthday oh, so you're gonna die first then five is by nature a more serious person than his earlier four-year-old self so there is less giggling about the bathroom and silly language and he loves to make up stories when they get angry or upset they tend to express it verbally rather than physically or emotionally and girls tend to chew on their hair now

let's move on to advice from the authors

on how to enjoy this age as always, we need to manage our expectations and set up our child for success prevention is always better than the punishment we should ensure to spend a lot of time praising his effort because he's extremely proud of his increasing abilities the five-year-old also loves to be reassured that he's loved so we should tell him often it's important to note that the typical fabulous does not find it easy to admit wrongdoing they take it very personally so we shouldn't push too hard another typical behavior that might upset parents is that five-year-old’s can't resist taking things that belong to other people they have very low impulse control and they don't fully understand the concept of property.

So, when this happens, we should definitely return the object and explain that it's wrong but we shouldn't make a big deal of it your child is not a thief it's just typical behavior it's completely normal in terms of starting school the author's position is that we should look at the child's behavior age and not their birthday ages to determine if they are ready for school because a child might be high in Iq but it might not have the necessary social and emotional development to sustain being at school for the whole day and thrive there for five-year-old’s parents are the center of the universe they want to be good they want to do right and they want to please us so it is a great age to enjoy because the next predictable phase of this regulation is coming around five-and-a-half-year-old or whenever your child reaches the next phase at five and a half all of a sudden things aren't rosy anymore when previously he responded so easily with yes I will he's now most likely to say no i won't he starts to disobey and go against what is expected of him and he doesn't do it gently he becomes brash and combative and he's characteristically hesitant and decisive at times and at other times is over demanding and explosive your child may be the extremely shy one minute and then extremely bold the next he may be affectionate and then almost all of a sudden very antagonistic emotionally the child of this age may be in a constant state of tension, it may be the beginning of the tantrum.